i gots style!

I want to be this old lady when I grow up. Minus the dog, I'm not so much a pet person. I love that she says, "yeah, I have to wear these orthopedic support hose and comfortable shoes, but I'm not going to let it ruin my classic sense of style." The dress and the trench perfectly popped, rolled and cinched just ooze classic chic.

I love it.

Made with Love.

Lucky you! The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice. For you. This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:

1- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make.

2- What I create will be just for you.

3- It'll be done sometime in 2009.

4- You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a some kind of art, a homebaked treat, a mixtape?.... Who knows? Not even I!

5- I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you must repost this on your blog and offer the same to the first 5 people who do the same on your blog.

The first 5 people to do so and leave a comment telling me they did will win a FAB-U-LOUS homemade gift by me! Oh, and be sure to post a picture of what you win when you get it!

So....who will be the first 5 people?????

::sounds::

Wanted to post what I've been listening to lately, and why.

My mentions of being broke have been akin to beating a dead horse in my posts over at my creativity blog, so after this I'll stop bringing it up and just trust everyone has gotten the picture. Anyway, as a result of said broke-ness, I haven't been able to purchase any new music (and yes I do purchase music, support the art and all that, I even buy actual CD's because I like having the art in my hands!) So I've been clinging tightly to Pandora these days, and listening to mostly these two stations:

Adele

also featuring: Duffy, Sara Bareilles [really enjoying her stuff], Amy Winehouse, A Fine Frenzy [An album I own and love], Jem, Corinne Bailey Rae, Ingrid Michaelson, Yael Naim, etc...

Rosie Thomas

also featuring: Holly Brook, Sara Bareilles again, Missy Higgins, Joshua Radin, and more

Other stuff in rotation: She + Him [never gets old!], Feist [old faithful], Iron & Wine, Belle & Sebastian, Katie Herzig, etc...

I think a lot of my current thing for female vocalists/songwriters with gritty soul, groove, or just killer vocals is coming from my desire to be writing and singing. The inate craving for that comes in waves and lately it's been gigantic swells. I think the reality is that urge is always there, it's just been easy to be distracted from it when I am busy working and doing other stuff, but now with time on my hands and being contsantly in the "what does God have next for my life" frame of mind, it's screaming sometimes so loudly I feel sick.

My aunt gave me her piano and the movers brought it yesterday. I'm excited beyond words to get started building and brushing up on my piano skills [or current lack thereof] and get writing, but I simultaneously feel so overwhelmed by it, I don't know where to start. I bet Jesus will know...

say a little prayer.

Jesus, Jesus how I trust you,

How I've proved you over and over,

Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus,

Oh for grace to trust you more.

really?

I am seeking behavior modification as the easy way out. How backwards is that!

Rather than let Jesus capture my heart, I block His advances and try to make it okay by promising to fix my actions. At the very same time, I pray with my mouth Psalm 139:

23Search me, O God, and know my heart!
   Try me and know my thoughts!
24And see if there be any grievous way in me,
   and lead me in the way everlasting!

And in my head what I am thinking when I pray that is: I'm frustrated with where I've gotten myself, I don't like my surroundings, show me my sin so I can fix it and feel/look/act better... except the root of the sin, which is in my heart... just don't go there please.

The Lord has often brought me low by opening my eyes to the parallels between His relationship with me and that of a husband and wife, particularly an unfaithful wife, and this is just further example. How often have you seen marriages that are not ideal and both parties are trying to make it better by fixing fairly superficial things like circumstances and actions. Yet one or both parties are unwilling to open their hearts to the other person and as a result they both decay and their marriage dies as they consistantly deny the other person access, even if they stay together in law and proximity. The imagery of this scenario stirs deeply inside me. I am this wife. I let myself decay and ask why it happens, even though I know the answer. I beg Him to love me and pursue me, and He does. And when He does, I block Him off.

This self-preservation mechanism that wars inside of me has got it completely backwards.

[unfinished]

curved, creamy porcelain: beautiful, functional.
held in hands sodden with imperfections.
inside the stains of what was temporarily, deeply satisfying entrench in permanent residence.
wheels spin as the shell is shined and polished. the inside remains ignored.

a portion of clay hardens and dries out in the great artists hands.
the stale process is wrought with simultaneously reluctant and brazen declarations of war, of independence.
in beautifully crafted timing, the artist saturates the clay with life giving water and begins to painfully and lovingly break, soften and mold.

occupation.

the official list of what I want to be when I grow up {so.... now}.

[in alphabetical order]
america's next top model
anthropologie visual merchandiser
artist at large
barista
bartender
boutique owner
card maker
cupcake and treat maker
deejay
fashion designer
furniture designer
graphic designer
godly trophy wife
hairstylist
hip mama
interior designer
photographer
project runway contestant
singer
songwriter
thrift and antique store junkie
top chef
wedding planner

so in a nutshell:

:CREATOR:

to be continued...